Some people find some weird things...

It has been a while since I posted!

A lot has happened in the past few weeks, we hit week 6 as everyone knows is a nightmare. It sinks in that you are half way through and within a month all the work has to be in. It is the time to panic!

But at the beginning of the month I went to Elstree Studios! We went for a cinematography expo with university and it was really interesting to see all of the different sorts of equipment we could be using in the future. Here are the ugly lot I went with ;)

And I got to try the new canon camera coming out! Look at how happy I am!

I have also been doing lots of work on digital media, the main reason why I haven't updated here in a while as i have a digital media blog (you can access this via my profile). Someone in my class passed on this video to me, it relates to what I am doing but I also feel like I need to share this with the world. I just think it's brilliant!

I have done more too, but I'm just too tired to update now, especially after my work today (pictures will follow)

A big shout out to the people viewing me from around the world, mainly in Russia and Germany! I'd like to know who you are, add/follow me or something =D

My first week of being 20

Since the last blog, there has been a lot happening and other blogs to cope with. I have started my digital media blog, mainly for my research and development file to track my progress through the project. That has taken up quite a lot of my time, I just find the topic so fascinating! The blog link is in my profile :)

On the university side of things, I have received some results back. I have definitely been graded a first for the documentary (woop!) I got a first for my Ugly Betty essay and 2.1 for my Prince Essay :) For digital media I got high 2.1s on both my Maya and App projects, still got to hear about the set extension :) So all is good on that front!

An update on the script, I've stopped doing it. I feel the idea was not good enough and another person in my group had a brilliant idea so we're doing that instead. I decided to take on the editing role for the fiction project as I really need to learn avid and doing this will push me into learning it!

I can safely say it's been a great first week of being 20!

Therapist anyone?

So, i am on my phone right now, laying in bed staring into the dark abyss. I have a headache and another reality occupying my brain. I hate script writing. In my post several hours ago i mentioned the perfection quote, i like it but why can't i believe it!
As i have been laying in bed i just keep thinking- how can it be more real? Will it connect? Can the characters have more depth? And these questions are haunting and made me realise i have issues when it comes to believing in my script writing ability.

While ive been sat in bed, ive been thinking about how i can make it more real and the answer is draw on past experiences and feelings. So ive opened my mind. Big mistake. I now have all the horrible and sad feelings i usually use but no way to vent or use them, as this is a completely different style of script. I know i shouldnt be afraid to make mistakes, but when you pour your head and heart onto paper you want people to like it.
Lets hope i can sort this out.
(apologies for bad spelling/grammar, mainly to the frustrated me of the future who will be looking back at this #suckstobeaperfectionist)

Everyone needs a pair of fluffy socks...

Halfway through my first week back and I am writing a script, and I want to tear my hair out. I just feel the pressure of making the script good, as I am the only one actively writing one in our group so far. Bad scripts= bad films and I do not want to be the source of that.

However, this book is a gods send:

Crafting Short Screenplays that connect by Claudia Hunter Johnson is my bible, but I can't absorb myself in the whole writing process because I don't really believe in myself, I just think I'm a bit shit at writing. I think I try too hard.

On a lighter note, my new fluffy socks make my feet feel like they are in heaven =D

"Do not fear mistakes, there are none..." - C.H.J

Happy new year and all that...

So my last post was over a month ago, and who could blame me. I've been stuffing myself with food, alcohol and having a good old rest to recover from the past few months. I am now up, and for the most part, ready to go. I am 20 in 1 week 2 days, so my dreams I had when I was 14 of becoming a media child prodigy have quickly died along with the majority of my years of education behind me. Quite scary to know that in a year and a half I shall be cast out into the world on my own, to find my way into media to do whatever I want with my life.

But I know I am slowly getting there. My last post was a giant rant about people not taking me seriously and all that jazz. However, as I learnt today, my struggles have not been in vain. I was pulled aside at the end of a seminar  to be told that people were very pleased/ impressed in what I had done in the documentary project and complimented me on how I handled such a challenging group. I was also told that as the confident one, I need to take charge and put people in their place more often, which is certainly going to happen. I was also told that my initial grade is a First which i am overjoyed with, let's hope it doesn't change too much in the 2nd marking phase :)

So all in all, so far this year has been good so far :)
(and I won my first ever amount on the lottery: £10 woop!)

Blogging with beans

While I am sat here eating my very student stereotypical bowl of beans and sausage (so, it's bloody cold outside and I'm working!) I have had a realisation.

Today was our presentation of our final documentary. To be very honest with you I am not happy with it, at all, but that is because I know it could have been something much better, if people would have actually listened to me. This is the biggest problems I've faced over the past few years. At first, when I started doing media properly when I was about 13, I actually just thought  I was trying to be a control freak and should step back because other people know better/more. Now I'm at uni, I am quite young in comparison to some of the people I work with, but I have been doing media much longer than them and it just makes me want to scream when I do not get listened too. I may be younger, but have you thought that I actually know what I'm on about?! I am now one of the people that knows something.

To take the most recent example, this documentary for my single camera project, this has happened yet again, but not because I wasn't assertive (believe me, I was). I have been saying from the beginning about certain things not going to work or not having enough screentime etc. I kept repeating myself practically everyday, and in the edit this didn't change.

So as I sat in my presentation hearing feedback on our film I had to hold myself back. My tutor was picking out everything that I had warned the group about and been saying was not going to work. If anyone was to look at me they would have thought I wanted to tear the room apart with my mind, I was holding back that much. I just wanted to burst out!

But I've realised how I've become a bit more professional in the past few weeks because of it all. I have never had to shout at someone I worked with before. I don't take members of my group to the side to 'criticise them as a professional' when I'm actually gonna tell them how awful they are or always tell members of the group to always act professional. (There are 2 types of people: 1: professionals- that don't bang on about being professional and do it   2: idiots- who actually know nothing and have to cover that up by saying the word professional as many times in a sentence as they can)

I am now just sat in my chair, smug in the comfort that I was right and I know that I was. At least I know I have really grown as a person.

But mark my words, I will never be spoken down to again...

Why oh why have the DVD gods forsaken me?

I am in the edit suite atm, have been for 5 hours. We need to burn stuff to.DVD and its being a massive pain! It's been interlacing all of our video for the sake of 1 button. I am annoyed to say the least.

My new enemy- adobe encore